…my own personalized 6'4" Bed Warmer is up North of the Border and I am in serious need of its return. It has been frickin' cold every night for the last three nights and it is an experience that I do not cotton to…I am wearing chef pants, long sleeve shirt, and socks to bed…Our big yellow cat has been sleeping at the bottom of the bed and he is a poor substitute. I will never take my Bed Warmer for granted…I promise. I am including a photo of said Bed Warmer…kinda cute!
….back in the old days in New York I heard of either a poem or a book by the poet Ann Sexton entitled "The Awful Rowing Toward God". Because those days in New York were a bit nihilistic for me, I sorta related to that particular title…somewhere along the line, the rowing has become less arduous and at times life has become more joyous and I acknowledge the precious gift that I have been given. Today in Mexico we celebrate Dia De Los Muertos…we acknowledge our ancestors and friends who have passed on into the ether of the Mystery. I have been feeling a bit bittersweet this morning…remembering friends from the past. I am so absolutely grateful to be alive. I thank this godliness that surrounds us in this most beautiful way…I am blessed to the "nth" degree to be amongst such beatific friends and critters. To share this life with such a magical soul like Richard is pure magic….the rowing is joyous…the rowing is mysterious…the rowing is divine.
…the Dia de Los Muertos activities are beginning to occur around us in Mexico. We are making an altar here at the house. We are honoring those that we knew who passed on….Goddess please Love and Protect their spirits. The other night I heard pigs being slaughtered in the distance for the traditional meals…a strange evocative and frightening sound. Living here in Mexico away from the strong gringo presence in San Miguel can get awfully real and we feel honored to live in the campo…So we send best wishes to those who left before us…may their courage and wisdom help us in our time of passing…
This was sent to us from a visitor to our house last winter. He recorded original music for it…I was impressed…as a side note to this slide show…our creative life here is full and glorious and would not exist without the help of Carlos, Martina and Transito Ramirez…our Mexican Family…Viva Casa de las Ranas y Mexico! Either click or copy this link to your browser…It's Beautiful!
I need to forget about eating sugar…I am wide awake at 3:02am after 2 helpings of tres leche cake at Sudheer's house this evening. Well, maybe I can blame the cake…I can also blame my behavior when I am with my old friend Sudheer. We share a mutual friend and I must admit, I am still at odds with her….I have to own the fact that I continue to have issues with her and it has nothing to do with Sudheer. While he and I are going back and forth in our discussion of her…our house guests and Richard are left somewhat amazed and left out…I am fueling the "conversation" with Sudheer as I pick at the tres leche cake…and here I am …hours later…wide awake and somewhat ashamed about our conversation…letting go is so very tedious….Anado (I address myself)…just chill…as I write this, I realize the above mentioned woman has nothing to do with my lack of sleep…she is just a friend who happened to pass through my life and I latched on to some sort of blame that I could heap on her for her inability to live up to my expectations…so…it is expectations and tres leche…..a wicked combination…I shall move on…include a photo of Richard and I for this post and then attempt to return to sleep…maybe in my dreams I can bury the hatchet…or have another piece of cake and offer some to my friends….
…that is where I have been…Mexico City too…blame it on avoidance…fear of risk…but it is time to remind myself of what ol' Mister Rumi said: "even though you have broken your vows a thousand times…come yet come again"…so here I am the prodigal groove…house guest from Oklahoma arriving today…work in the studio…need to make money…remembering my self…my True Nature…trusting…that kind of thing….